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Dear Kathy, I'm rather new to the lesbian community.I haven't been out for very long and I am just starting to go to GLBT youth groups, gay clubs and gay coffee shops.This information is not new to me, but I have to be honest and say that I am surprised that there are no butch/butch relationships.
And, should you leave a situation at the request of your partner that would’ve turned out fine, you lose nothing.There is nothing better than making a bold statement and when people look and question ‘is it a guy and a girl’ or ‘is that two girls?’ it gives the straights something to think about and that is a deffo positive.In this case, it’s better to err on the side of safety–and on the side of your girlfriend or wife.You’ll never regret trusting her, but you will absolutely regret questioning her.Plus, two femmes together is a sexual fantasy for most straight men and they often imagine that they can join in. Just by living in their truth black butch women (black studs, black doms, black tomobois, black masculine of center women or whatever label you want to use) risk being victimized by some insecure heterosexist male asshole who sees her as a threat to his own masculinity.The #Black Lives Matter movement has shed a much needed light on how brutal and unsafe life in America is for black men, black trans women and of course black cis women. Men like these tie their manhood to subjugating women and collecting women’s affection like trophies.Looking back, I realize how shallow and selfish I was to use her in satisfying my own curiosity, but the universe got me back when I ended up falling hard for a woman who had never so much as used concealer to cover a zit.These rules are not to be interpreted as rules for feminine lesbians to heed their masculine partners’ every request.What I have observed through these new experiences are the dynamics of the lesbian relationship.Any relationship I observe are butch/femme and femme/femme.